Beyonce Knowles (I wondering if she’ll become known as Mrs. Z) is sporting a square-cut 18-carat rock valued at more than $5 million, according to People magazine. She’s not the first celebrity to wear jewelry approximating the gross national product of many countries and she won’t be the last, but am I missing something. What fun is bling that requires a team of armed guards to wear. Bling is supposed to be fun. And although I’ve never attempted to walk around with a sizeable fortune on my finger, I think it would make me anxious. So now, it’s an event when she wears the rock. If she wore it everyday, there would probably be dire results. The general publics biggest fear is $5 a gallon gas and you’re waltzing down Rodeo Drive sporting $5 million. Not good. Desperate times do not make people kind.

The above photo is from the Fashion Rocks concert in New York earlier this month. There were enough stars, guards and bling-aficionados to justify an appearance by the dazzling jewel. Although she and Jay-Z are said to have married in April, the couple doesn’t speak of the ceremony, the marriage or the ring.

There’s a limit to how enviable ludicrously expensive baubles are. I’d like to think that I’d return a ring that cost $5 million ring and select something slightly less grotesque and then do something charitable with the balance (not that the ring is grotesque, it actually looks quite nice for a cocktail ring. I have one that size, but it only cost me $14.99). But having said all that I doubt that I’ll ever have the opportunity to be so pious.