Giveaway Day 10: The best parenting advice
WINNERS UPDATE: Thank you to all who shared such heartfelt and sound advice. I tried to pick my top two favorites based on originality, practicality and emotional response (the words touched the truth of my own parenting experience). Using that criteria, I’ve picked Julie who shared her grandma’s profound yet simple observation and wsragan, who talked about the “big eyes” I remember from my own childhood. Once again, it was a pleasure to read the entries.
For the grand finale and last day of our 10-day giveaway, I’ve got a simple question: What is the best parenting advice you have ever received?
(Also visit http://www.stltoday.com/steals and http://www.stltoday.com/stylefile for two more chances to win.)
Here’s some of the best of what I heard before becoming a mom:
“Little people, little problems. Big people, big problems.” — from a co-worker who had teens when I had babies.
“Go to as many movies as you possibly can before the baby comes.” — from a wise mom at my baby shower
“Try to enjoy it (when they are little) because they really do grow up so fast.”
The contest runs through the weekend, and winner will be announced on Monday. Previous winners on this blog are ineligible to win another prize, but their sage wisdom is much appreciated. I’ll pick my two favorite entries from the comments posted below and the winners will each get an adorable, Special Edition Build-A-Bear teddy bear complete with an outfit and cardboard “home.” I don’t have a picture of the exact bear, but here’s one from the website that’s pretty close:
Build a Bear
Aisha covered education and breaking news for nearly ten years before joining the Lifestyle staff where she writes a "Dirty Laundry" parenting column. She is the home and family editor and wastes too much time on Facebook and political blogs. 
You have got to be responsible for yourself.
You may not always like your children (specifially, what your children do), but you will always love them.
The best advice was from a landscaper who was working in our yard while I was pregnant with our first. As the father of 7, he told us that raising children was like caring for our newly landscaped yard. “For beautiful and straight trees, prune them early and prune them hard.” If you use firm and consistent correction in the beginning, you won’t have to cut large limbs in the future, which could leave permanent scars. After ten years of consistent and firm correction, my husband and I regularly receive feedback from teachers and strangers about how polite and well-behaved our three children are. A recent comment was from a Walmart employee who marveled when my 7 year old asked her to “please check out his gum” and then thanked her when she handed it to him.
If parenting is the hardest thing you’ve ever done, you’re not doing it right!
At home, you will never “get in trouble.” Home is a safe place. At home you will get love and care. Like a hospital emergency room, if there is a problem, come home, and we will get to work on it. It doesn’t matter what happened, or how it happened, we will care for you.
This doesn’t mean that there isn’t responsibility or consequences, or difficult conversations about what was missing to cause an upset or a breakdown.
Like the care you get in an hospital emergency room we will deliver it without judgement, with straight talk for what works best for you.
The best parenting advice I have ever heard was from my husband. When we met, he was the father of a five year old. His advice: Don’t ask a question for which you already know the answer. For example, if you know your child got in trouble at school (because the teacher called) don’t ask him/her “what happened at school today”. This will only prompt your child to tell a lie which means double trouble. Instead, start the conversation with what you know, and go from there. Great advice.
I like the tree pruning analogy, right on. Start early with requiring A’s in school. The better they are earlier the easier it is as they get older, and the more doors that will be open.
Don’t say “no” when a “yes” wouldn’t hurt!
The best advice I’ve heard (and I now give it to others new moms), is to understand that other people want to help, and they will give you advice on anything and everything related to parenting. Listen to them, say thanks, and then do what works for YOUR family. Every child is different and techniques that worked with one child may or may not work with another.
“Give your teenager a little slack, their brains aren’t fully developed at this point.”