Sponge Bob Has Left the Pineapple OR Time to Start Spending More Quality Time Together

I have a dual resolution: part one is to spend more quality time with my two kids and part two is get them as far away from the TV and video games as I can for the longest possible time I can.

I don’t normally make New Year’s resolutions, I am more the type of person who implements such things in the spring as the weather changes or around my birthday in the fall. This year however, after taking a long look at my life over a period of six or so months, I decided it was time to nip some things in the bud. So, maybe I am slow to notice things, I don’t know… but a couple of things happened to me over a course of a few months that finally hit me like a glass of cold water being splashed in my face.

The first incident that led to the realization that things must change was an experience I had helping my son return a defunct video game. When we were at the video game store, I noticed that the three store employees, ostensibly in the their early twenties, all shared the same round doughy and pasty skinned androgynous appearance. I guessed that one of them was a woman because she did not have facial hair like the other two. These folks were very pleasant, don’t get me wrong but the most disturbing part was that they were so into the video games they were actually arguing with my son about what certain characters did and they didn’t look at you while they were talking to you because they were playing the video games while they helped us and clearly, all they did was play video games every waking moment of their life. I took a look at my son and could see he had that same preoccupied gaze in his eyes and his skin seemed to be losing his healthy glow, I hurried him out of the store and into the sunlight and we went to the playground instead of going home so he could play the new video game.

The second incident occurred when I called my son to tell him I would be late picking him up at his grandmother’s house because I had a meeting. He said, “So you are coming to get me because we are going to a meeting?” and I said, “No, I am running late because I have a meeting.” and he said, “Oh, good, I don’t have to go to a meeting tonight!” and I could hear his brother in the background cheering, “No meeting tonight!” As I drove to get them, after my meeting, I felt this shroud of guilt drape over me, they were trained to live my hectic life, a delicate balance between work, family and fun. I am still struggling with this issue. How does one handle all of these things without just going nuts or losing sleep?

One remedy was finding something we could all do together that we enjoyed. Early in the fall, I asked the South City Open Studio and Gallery (SCOSaG) www.scosag.org in Tower Grove Park about us all taking a class together. Apparently I was not the only parent who had made this inquiry, and we were able to go one hour a week to their studio and make fun things together under the direction of Carolyn Simon, SCOSaG’s director. Carolyn relates wonderfully with the children and instantly got them hooked on creating figurines from clay and drawing. We all look forward to these evenings where we sit around a big table, create and talk and talk and talk! This definitely helps us achieve the goal of spending more time together and staying away from anything electronic! 

We have signed up for classes at the YMCA (for them karate) and the Gifted Resource Council http://www.giftedresourcecouncil.org/ (also for them and these are great Saturday classes, very fun and educational!)  The Saturday classes get us out of the house, I get my chores done and errands run and then we go and do something fun.

Keeping them away from the video games is harder.  I have tricked them into doing projects at home like assembling the “do it yourself” toys I got them for Christmas.  One night they spent the whole night working on a robot together.

I am trying to get them out to do quality and cultural activities.  Saturday we went to the zoo and Sunday I took them to the Art Museum www.slam.org to see the George Caleb Bingham exhibit.  They went with me somewhat begrudgingly but in the end, we had a great conversation and they learned that women were not allowed to vote until 1920.  We also spent some time walking through the African mask section, at the request of my 9-year old.

Currently, I am working on finding more things we can do together that are away from the TV and out of the house. One of the issues I will write more about is balancing the activities between things I like to do and find interesting with things the children like to do and find interesting.  Also, I will tell you all how life goes when the children finally realize there is no cable TV (I cancelled our subscription!)

RL’E