Careful… You might give a 12 year old the idea that personal choices have consequences. That would not fit in with the “progressive” evolution of our society and culture.

Here’s a run-down on teen issues that I have dealt with in the past 20 working days: (After you read them, ask youself where pink hair enters into the discussion–or if it does):

1) 15-yr Female. Pregnant. Mother is deceased. Father thinks she’s an angel. May have attempted a self-administered abortive procedure.
2) 16-yr Female. Can’t stand her own sight because she is a lesbian.
3) 17-yr Male and 15-yr Male: Both coming to terms with being gay. Neither can admit same to parents (fathers especially). Both think their school buddies are on to them.
4) 15-yr Female. Is 15 minutes away from becoming a high-school dropout, lacks ambition, incentive, self-identity, self-respect. Is likely on the path to prostitution.
5) 16-yr Male. Straight. Convinced he is a female in a male’s body.
6) 12-yr Male. Found out he’s been lied to about his paternity.
7) 15 yr Male. One brother is pre-med; the other is finishing his MS. Both parents are successful professionals. The 15 yr old can hardly read.

If we expect our kids to create something in life, they must first “be” something. But they first must be given the opportunity to “become”.

As a defiant one, I think what this youngster has done is just fine. I don’t understand why pink hair is a problem, but I realize that schools have rules. I hope in the end that this young person sees that she can still be herself, even in the face of those who would oppose her. At the same time I would hope that the principal would see that there are many things worse than pink hair. My bet is that the girl will learn, the principal will not.

“Careful… You might give a 12 year old the idea that personal choices have consequences. That would not fit in with the “progressive” evolution of our society and culture.”

Do you think a young person covered with tattoos, multiple piercings and brandings and sporting rainbow-colored spiked hair might be shocked to discover that they may have difficulty landing a position when out seeking gainful employment? Would their first impulse be to claim discrimination or might they consider their choices might rightly have something to do with their difficulty?

It’s obvious that the girl wanted not only attention but also wanted to bend if not break the rules. I believe that a pink ribbon would have sufficed and would have promoted more positive conversation.

SSK: I have several regrets in life. One is that I took school and my teen years too seriously. Didn’t enjoy all the fun stuff that others enjoyed. My own fault. Always driven to reach my goals, which was OK, but I didn’t necessarily enjoy myself along the way. “Life’s a journey, not a destination,” as someone once said. Didn’t smoke a joint until 3 years ago! If my wife and I decide one day to have children, I want first for them to be happy and to feel secure, then I want to offer to them an age-appropriate environment in which to grow up. We’re adults for a long, long time. We’re kids just a few short years!

Thanks Kurt for grabbing this topic and putting it on here.

To jfmoyn: The principal has nothing to learn here. If anything he is in a no win situation. If he doesn’t enforce the rules then more and more kids will try to get away with more and more things. If he does enforce the rules than he is an oppresive monster who squashes individualism. There is nothing wrong with expressing yourself as long as it doesn’t interfere with the daily function of the school. He felt it would be and it is his job to make that decision. Let’s not forget that she has been warned previously about comeing to school with pink streaks in her hair.

To be honest I would have been OK either way with this decision (send her home or let her stay). One thing I would like to say is that, in the picture that I saw, her hair almost looked red instead of pink. It was hardly a shocking shade. In the end though as long as the rules are applied evenly to all in the school then so be it.

I think it is great that she wanted to honor her father’s memory. She just can’t do it with pink hair and school anymore. I’m sure she will find another way to do so, and I hope she gets some good suggestions from people if she can’t think of anything.

Before someone starts spouting about Freedom of Speech by the way, the Supreme Court has ruled on this type of issue multiple times and has said that schools can limit things like clothing and hair in order to maintain discipline.

As to Kurt’s question, there is nothing wrong with civil disobedience to make a point as long as it is peaceful. Throwing paint on fur coats or bombing a clinic does more harm than good to your cause.

Wouldn’t it be neat to see all her friends come to school one day with pink hair to support her? That would be a good show of civil disobedience and make their point in a peaceful and supportive way.

But going back to the principal, that job is no win and as long as the rules are applied the same to all kids I don’t have a problem with him doing his job.

Ryan, out of curiosity, how does smoking a joint make life suddenly more enjoyable?

There is nothing wrong with letting your kids explore their boundaries while keeping them focused and directed too. You can have both in limited amounts, and that is what makes the best people in my opinion. I didn’t get to do every crazy thing I wanted, but now that I have a good career and am able to take care of myself for the rest of my life I am glad that those boundaries and directed focus was there. Your right we are only kids for a few short years, but you have to be an adult for a hell of a lot longer and that is a lot harder than doing anything in your childhood. You can still be young as an adult. It’s a lot harder to be an adult if you never grew up.

Go for it Amelia! Maybe I’ll dye my hair too.

It’s just hair people. It’s not like she’s carrying weapons into school or selling crack in health class. It’s just hair. Others should probably let theirs down a little more.

I think there are other reasons for the pink hair. Her father has been gone for 6 years now. Has she only decided to show this tribute since she has almost become a teenager? Pink is the adapted color for breast cancer. I know men can get breast cancer but did her father dye from breast cancer. Its obvious that the child has issues that she needs to get over. I think this is an outcry from here more than a tribute to her father. There is a deeper story. Civil disobedience has its place. I’m not sure I would call this civil disobedience as much as a confused child. Were you ever mixed up at 12???