Did Lance Armstrong try to scam a French drug tester back on March 17? Or are French officials again going overboard in their quest to take down the Great American Cyclist?

We may never get the real answer, but France’s anti-doping agency is threatening sanctions against the seven-time Tour de France champion.

At issue is a 20-minute delay in Armstrong’s cooperation with a drug tester. He took a shower while his people verified the tester’s credentials.

At issue, of course, is whether that delay gave Armstrong time to bogart the exam. ESPN.com explains:

The rationale for the rule that testers must keep athletes in sight at all times is based on a long history of athletes coming up with novel methods to try to beat tests. Numerous sites on the Internet offer advice on methods, some of which are practiced by non-athletes who have to pass workplace drug tests.

Athletes have filled devices with diluted urine, swapped out another person’s urine and even injected clean urine into their own bladders with syringes or catheters. In 2005, then-Minnesota Vikings running back Onterrio Smith was caught with vials of dried urine and a contraption called “The Original Whizzinator,” which featured a prosthetic penis and fake bladder attached to a jockstrap. He was later suspended for a year for accumulated violations under the league’s substance abuse policy and has not played in the NFL since.

Ordinary laundry soap can alter urine chemistry if an athlete introduces it into the urine stream by putting it on his hands. A witness in the doping arbitration case against American cyclist Kayle Leogrande last year alleged he did that. Based on that testimony and other evidence, Leogrande was suspended from competition for two years, even though he did not fail a doping test.

In the wake of this incident, Armstrong used Twitter to fire this salvo at the French: “Was winning the Tour seven times that offensive?!?”

Tipsheet wants Armstrong to ride on forever, thanks to his ability to produce ads like this one:

MYSTERIES OF THE UNIVERSE

Questions to ponder while wondering if Chris Carpenter can keep this up:

• Will Tony La Russa ever use the same lineup twice this season?
• Wouldn’t it be fun to see if rookie David Freese can settle in at third base?
• On the other hand, will peppy Joe Thurston help Cardinals fans get over Aaron Miles‘ off-season departure?

THE DALY STRUGGLE

John Daly is at The Masters this weekend. He isn’t playing, of course. He is finishing off his six-month PGA Tour suspension for conduct unbecoming a pro golfer.

But he is manning his souvenir stand outside the gates of Augusta National. He and his latest girlfriend, Anna Cladakis, are selling Daly merchandise out of their RV.

“I can’t believe how much he’s been embraced this week,” Cladakis told the Associated Press. “That, for me and for John, was important.”

Daly is slimmer by 40 pounds these days, thanks to gastric surgery. He is nearing bankruptcy and he has lost all of his sponsors.

“I always talk about the things in my life that have happened because it might help somebody,” Daly said Thursday. “We all make mistakes, everybody knows that. But most people are too embarrassed or too scared to admit them. I’m not, it’s part of life.”

This TV segment, pre-surgery, sums up the whole Daly Experience well:

QUIPS ‘R US

Here is what some of America’s leading sports pundits have been writing:

Gene Wojciechowski, ESPN.com: “Augusta National was so friendly that I think Harry Connick Jr., who’s doing those precious tournament TV haikus, broke par. Thirty-eight players shot sub-par first rounds — the most ever here — compared with nine in 2007 and 18 a year ago. And from 2002 to 2008 there have been only five 67s or better here. There were that many on Thursday. If you’re counting tempers, Tiger Woods finished in the red. He somehow shot 70, which puts him tied for 19th place and 5 shots behind Chad Campbell. You could have boiled lobster on his forehead, especially after he missed makeable birdie putts on 16 and 17 and made a mess of 18 with a bogey.”

Jerry Greene, Orlando Sentinel: “With cars and banks getting out of the sports advertising biz, booze is back. The Phoenix Coyotes hockey club had an offer where you buy a bottle of Smirnoff vodka and get a ticket to a game. Such a deal — be smashed before you get there. It’s not just hockey. At Wrigley Field, they just opened the Captain Morgan Club.”

Norman Chad, Washington Post: “This is the so-called Information Age, characterized, rather unfortunately, by too much information. Frankly, I don’t want all-access. It was better when we knew less about our entertainers and athletes — nothing detracted from their on-screen or on-field image. Before my time, Clark Gable was a big movie star and Rocky Marciano was a boxing icon, and I guarantee you my father couldn’t tell you two things about their personal lives. These days, I walk into a Brad Pitt film and I’m thinking about the Vietnamese boy he and Angelina adopted; I tune into a Yankees game and I’m wondering if A-Rod was with Madonna the night before.”.

Dwight Perry, Seattle Times: “UNLV, having switched to Nike, will sell off its old athletic apparel such as shirts and shorts at a good, old-fashioned yard sale at Rebel Park on April 18, with items priced from $1 to $50. Unfortunately not for sale: Jerry Tarkanian’s game-chewed towels, Grandmama’s housecoat and Richard ‘The Fixer’ Perry’s hot tub.”

MEGAPHONE

“That’s fine. Troy, I think he has three Super Bowl rings, so he has the authority to say that. I’ve been called selfish pretty much throughout my career. I think I’m in good company. Jerry Rice has been called selfish before. So, other than that, it doesn’t bother me what he says.”

Buffalo Bills receiver Terrell Owens, responding to Troy Aikman’s claim that the Cowboys are better off without him.